In my freshman year in college, whenever I felt a little lost and needed time for myself, I always watched a movie alone. Well not entirely alone as 8 slices of cheap Hawaiian Pizza would always accompany me along with a large drink of soda.
I would have some sort of tradition. I would sit myself in the middle aisle, wait for the lights to come down, open the box of pizza and eat the first slice by the time the first trailer comes up on the silver screen.
Every bite of the thick, chewy dough smothered with tomato sauce, processed ham, cheese and crushed pineapple tidbits was a reassurance that the food, the cinema and the movie, no matter how crappy, were all my choices. I was in that age when proclaiming my independence was top priority.
I used to do a lot of crappy shit in my youth like going home drunk and shoeless, skipping classes to watch Joey de Leon and Rene Requiestas movies and asking my dad for extra money for some non-existent school project. I would never call my mom if I was coming home late (no mobile phones back then); volunteer to sing in a karaoke bar while the hosts make fun of me and wear patched leather pigskin bustiers (heavily padded) to classes. My juvenile self back then thought that all the fun I chose to have were signs of independence.
Looking back now, they were merely follies of my youth. I was one of them artsy fartsy bohemians who thought she could change the world.
That was 20 years and twenty pounds ago.
The world has indeed changed. Kids can now SMS their moms to tell them they'd be coming home late and even send an MMS for some photographic proof of where they are and who they're with. Kids don't go to movies unless they're Hollywood blockbusters with some robot, superhero or blood-sucking vampires. And when they do, these calorie-counting kids can buy just a slice of pizza to take with them to the movie house.
Recently, I bought a whole Hawaiian pizza for myself at the supermarket. I never got to finish it though because as much as I wanted to relive my youthful days of independence, I realized I had to lose all the pounds I gained from years of eating pizzas by myself.